(April 20, 2011)
The past 2 days I’ve been watching movies about love like- love and other drugs, serendipity, and click. And, I’m still planning on watching more in the coming week since I’ve got nothing else to do. :)
So anyway, people who watch love stories ends up with a reaction like.. “Wow, that was nice!”. “It’s inspiring!”. “No that shouldn’t have happened!”. “it was just like my love story!”. Well, that last reaction, I wish that could’ve been mine but it isn’t like that. First is because I haven’t got an amazing ending for my love story AND, my usual reaction after every movie is- I cry, and I wish that guy was real and that he’d love me that way. Or that I pity myself.
Sometimes I blame these kinds of movie for giving me high hopes, false hopes, and getting me into wishful thinking. But sometimes, I also thank them for making me feel like it’s never impossible. But who am I kidding, negative feelings would last more or will always be the last thoughts. This goes to love songs too. I don’t know if the main reason for releasing them is to make you feel hopeless, or hopeful. Weird but it actually gives me both. Which makes things a little more confusing and unbearable sometimes.
When you come to think of it, love is really like drugs. It heals you, but it doesn’t mean you won’t be feeling any painful side effects or sometimes you’d find out that you’re allergic to it. Since I’m allergic to medicines except for a few like Tylenol and those for allergies, at times I think that all that had passed me by were the ones I thought would.. Mend me or something. Or that they will be my maintenance medicines that will make me better each time. Apparently they all end up being the medicines I’m allergic with and makes my eyes puffy. With them though, it’s cos of crying and not cos I’m literally allergic to them like medicines. I wish it was like that where I’d get allergic reactions when I meet a wrong guy. Hah. And the medicine that’s for me is I don’t know, either paced out already, or proven unhelpful?
Or love could also be those bad drugs drug addicts take and sell. It makes you high, blissful in a weird and unexplainable way, and satisfied (wait don’t get me wrong, haven’t tried one, that’s just what people say about what drugs can do. Just putting it out there *wink* ) but then when you’ve had enough of it, you’d get really sick or worst, dead.
Applicable cause and effects right there. When you love too much and you forget yourself, it’s either they leave you because you gave them too much and they would feel overprotected OR they’d leave you because they didn’t really love you and your left with nothing since you gave them everything you’ve got.
Even though I get all depressed with these movies about love, I would still have them as lesson-givers, since I learn things from every bit of lessons that they show. And one thing about me is that I always try to look for good reasons or a better meaning with almost everything. Goes with watching, cos I always try to really see what it has to give me. Other times though, I think I over-think, thus, making me depressed and disappointed about my own story.